I am a Victoria's Secret Model

I am a Victoria’s Secret Model.

I am America’s Next Top Model.                                    

I am the next American Idol.

I am Top Chef.

I am the next best-selling author.

At least in my head I am.

I’m also a realist and I understand I’m a pear-shaped, shaky soprano, take-out queen.

But in my head I’m a lot of things. That’s where all of my dreams, aspirations, and confidence live, in the conscience of my being. What’s swimming in the depths of your core? What are you dreaming of achieving?

As I’ve aged I’ve realized a few things about dreams. They coincide greatly with your confidence. You are either your worst critic or your best cheerleader. All greatness comes from a core belief inside you, not from your mom, dad, brother, sister, dog, friend, boss, or spouse. It comes solely from you. Do tell me, who is lining your subconscious sideline, a critic or a cheerleader?

Growing up I was teased about my big nose (um, duh, I’m Italian). In high school, I didn’t go to prom. I wasn’t even asked. In college, I was self-conscience about my hips, thighs and butt. I felt bad about myself. And when the many would compliment me, contrary to what the few had critiqued me on, I would brush it off. Because it was easier to believe what the critics would say – because that is what I believed.

And then something happened. Little by little, I built upon the small and fleeting moments of self-love. I contribute a lot of this revelation to maturing and determining that I’m not going to live based on what others think of me. The other part came from the encouraging words of others, being successful in my work, and allowing the real Stephanie to stand up.

Here is how you can begin believing you are more than what you think you are:

1. Accept and believe the compliments you receive. When someone decides to say something of a complimentary nature, it is downright rude of you not to accept it. So be polite and say thank you. Most people are trained to challenge or argue compliments. Who taught you that? Didn’t your mother teach you better than that? Don’t discount their compliment because of your own self-doubt. Instead build upon it. When you start with a thank you and focus on what they have told you, you will begin to build up your own self-confidence.

2. Write down self-love affirmations. There are things that you love about yourself. Come on, you’re sexy and you know it! Your job is to capture these and write them down. Just like goals, it’s easier to believe something when it’s written down. You don’t have to share these with anyone, BUT you do need to share them with yourself. Capture the thoughts, dreams, and aspirations that are in the corners of your heart and head. The thoughts you believe others would find you insane, for these are the real gems.

3. Ignore the critics. It’s not easy, but it is necessary to build your self-confidence. It may sting at first, but the easiest response is to treat the critic just like the cheerleader and say “thank you.” However, instead of accepting it, dismiss it. Easier said than done, I know. But it’s necessary. You are not living your life for anyone other than you. Once you realize this truth, you will break free from the chains of criticism.

4. Encourage others. You will in turn encourage yourself. If you want to build up your own self-belief, self-confidence, and self-love, start by building someone else’s. The positive words you speak to others will start to creep into your own subconscious, challenging you to believe more in yourself. Try it out. The worst that can happen is you help someone. Would that be so terrible?

These days I see my nose as a symbol of my heritage. I’m embracing my pear assets. And I believe it when someone tells me I’m beautiful. I believe it, because I, internally with all of who I am, truly believe it. Now where’s the runway?

I’m your Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. How may I help you help yourself?

Stephanie Melish, one of the few, hand-selected, Gitomer-Certified Speakers is the ONLY Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista in the world! Stephanie trains, sells, and speaks to companies and associations all over the country. To book Stephanie for your next event, please visit www.GitomerCertified.com or contact the friendly folks at Buy Gitomer via email at hirestephanie@gitomer.com or by calling 704-333-1112.

Colorful Creativity

"Creativity is seeing an opportunity for more than what it appears to be."

This quote came to me as I was sitting in my favorite coffeehouse writing spot (Cast Iron Waffles), listening to the Coffeehouse satellite station (Into the Mystic by Van Morrison was playing), and working on an upcoming keynote.

I furiously typed it up hoping not to lose it before it leapt out of my mind unable to be remembered. Know what I mean?

I speak about creativity in my keynote presentations and I was trying to figure out how to wrap it up nice and neat with a bow to get an “aha” moment from the audience. I’ve learned while growing up and being earmarked as a “creative” person, that there are whole loads of people who don’t think they are creative beings.

Boy, are they WRONG! Everyone is creative (quit shaking your head – yes, YOU, are creative!) in some unique way - whether you are a chemist, engineer, farmer, marketer, or writer. But that’s another article. Right, Andy Horner?

Anyway, this quote came as a result of this story:

I wrote an article on Pinterest.

A man, Tony Frank, emailed me with three things: praise, a Pinterest request, and an offer:

“I own a small business that develops custom cartoons to market ideas, most specifically gift planning to non-profit fundraisers like myself. If you ever find yourself needing a cartoon to convey an idea, lemme know. We'll work one up for ya, no charge. (www.lanceandrew.com)”

Hmmm…I thought. And thought. And thought. For eight days before I replied:

“I just thought of a great way for you to help me.  I'm getting married in a few months and we are having an adult’s only reception EXCEPT for my fiancé’s 10 nieces and nephews. I had been planning on putting crayons and coloring books on their reception tables to keep them entertained. But you know what would be even cooler?  If you could draw a black and white cartoon of my fiancé and I for them to color in that day!  It would be something we could keep.”

And he did. And we used it. And it was a HIT!

Now most people would have only saw it for face value (a cartoon to use for my presentations) and stopped there. Most people think I have audacity for asking for more than the favor offered. Most people are followers. Not me.

I was presented an opportunity.

I thought about it.

I formed a vision.

I asked.

I received.

And they colored.

Do you think Tony is upset that I asked for something a little different than he originally presented to me? NO! He is now the inspiration of a quote, an article, and the colorful joy of ten children.

Here are the elements that I believe lead to creativity:

1. Think. Taking the time to view anything from another perspective can lead to a creative response. They don’t call it thinking outside the box for no reason. Just drop the box, that doesn’t matter, stretching your mind to think beyond the obvious, beyond what appears, is when the light bulbs get invented. What are you thinking about?

2. Environment. I think best in certain environments, usually coffeehouses. Shocker, I know! I’m creative in these places for two reasons; they make me happy and they eliminate distractions. The atmosphere boasts happiness: music, espresso machines, milk being steamed, and the aroma of coffee and specifically where I go, fresh baked liege waffles! The atmosphere omits distractions: television, John, Dunkin! The hardest element is figuring out what atmosphere you need to get your mind right for creative inspiration. Where is your distraction-free happy place?

3. Confidence. You must have the confidence and willingness to ask, to risk, and to open yourself up by sharing your ideas out loud. Many fear rejection more than they seek reward. I like reward. I’m confident in my thoughts and ideas REGARDLESS of others opinions of them. Some are nutty, some are pushy, some are bitchy, some are genius, and some are all of the above. I’m confident in asking for what I want (did you read Ask Kisser?) and I’m confident enough to risk my feelings in an effort to be creative. How confident are you in your ideas?

4. Experience. The more creative ideas you come up with the more they will continue to flow. Just like with any skill, the more you work at it and experience it, the more it will come naturally. If you hang around creative people they will rub off on you, they will inspire you and they will transform you. How are you experiencing creativity?

Shh…my very secret key to creativity is simple. Capture it! So often I don’t take the time to write ideas or thoughts down when they occur. And then, in a fleeting moment, they disappear. Thankfully, this one I caught and framed.

Want to see the fabulous cartoon by Lance Andrew? View it on my Sales Barista Facebook Page.

I’m your Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. How may I help you help yourself?

Stephanie Melish, one of the few, hand-selected, Gitomer-Certified Speakers is the ONLY Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista in the world! Stephanie trains, sells, and speaks to companies and associations all over the country. To book Stephanie for your next event, please visit www.GitomerCertified.com or contact the friendly folks at Buy Gitomer via email or by calling 704-333-1112.

It’s My sTORI and I’m Sticking to It!

Love her or hate her, Tori Spelling is capitalizing on a little something I call namesake branding. Recently launching an extension of her vast brand, Tori hit another branding home run by naming her new LA clothing store InvenTORI. Brilliant? No question.

After decades of only being known as the daughter of the late Aaron Spelling, and being ridiculed for her non-existing acting skills as virgin Donna while on Beverly Hills 90210 (although as a child of the Saved By the Bell years, I LOVED the dorky Violet Anne Bickerstaff), Tori has launched a mega-empire built on one thing, her name.

So NoTORIous (TV show), Tori & Dean: Inn Love (TV show), sTORI Telling (book), Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood (TV show), The Tori Spelling Collection (jewelry), uncharted terriTori (book), InvenTori (clothing store), Tori & Dean: sTORIbook Weddings (TV show).

Tori after Tori, she’s made an impressive namesake brand. Not a Tori Spelling fan? Think this is irrelevant because she’s my shining example? A few other great namesakes:

Gitomer, DUH! A branding king, each of his books and two of his companies are titled “Jeffrey Gitomer’s…” and his other company is BuyGitomer. Creative, smart, call to action. BUY – Gitomer!

Oprah, the queen of America, uses namesake branding too. The Oprah Winfrey Show, Harpo Studios (Oprah backwards), Harpo Productions, Harpo Films, OWN (Oprah Winfrey Network), O Magazine, O at Home, Oprah and Friends.

Got it?

But Tori isn’t stopping, her next book, celebraTORI releases this coming October. You may not think she is a great actress but she is a smart businesswoman. As a hands-on business owner of several companies, an author of three best-selling books, and appearing on reality TV, she has launched herself into a sTORIland all her own.

You may think there is not much to it. WRONG! Namesake branding is a moneymaking – image creating – story land.

What about your story? Your brand? Your image? Your creative spin? Your smart marketing appeal?

Think about all of the names connected to you. First name, last name, maiden name, middle name, nickname, company name, etc. How creatively congruent have you made your company? Or better yet, why should you take the time to namesake your branding? I’m so happy you asked!

1. It’s personable. Creating a brand around your name means you're creating a brand around YOU! And what’s more personable than a person? Doing business with someone who has poured out his or her heart, soul, and passion into their work is a must! And if they use their name it’s a no-brainer. I want to do business with someone who is committed to their work, their business, their industry, and their success. What bigger commitment can you make than putting your name on it? (Putting a ring on it – but that is usually followed by some kind of name change!)

2. It’s recognizable. The easiest way to get lost in the big business shuffle is to not be recognizable to your customers. Each of your products, services, and marketing efforts must have a consistent thread woven through their name. It all starts there. If you can be creative and consistent with the name, your customers will have immediate recognition of your personal brand.

3. It’s achievable. Capitalizing on your name is the easiest thing you can do. Thanks to your parents, they gave you one; all you have to do is start using it! Be creative, be wild, be out of the box, be different, BUT be uniform. I may work for a company that is not my own – but that didn’t stop me from creating my own brand – Stephanie Melish, the Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista, and it’s worked! If I can make it happen, so can you.

That’s my sTORI and I’m sticking to it!

I’m Stephanie Melish, your Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. How may I help you help yourself?

Stephanie Melish, one of the few, hand-selected, Gitomer-Certified Speakers is the ONLY Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista in the world! Stephanie trains, sells, and speaks to companies and associations all over the country. To book Stephanie for your next event, visit www.GitomerCertified.com or contact the friendly folks at Buy Gitomer via email or by calling 704-333-1112.

Your Face Won't Lift Itself!

Let’s be honest, it was time for Gitomer to get a face-lift! His weekly e-zine, Sales Caffeine, that is. Doesn’t it look great? Fresh, clean, sharp, modern, branded. After 485 weeks of production, the look of Sales Caffeine finally matches its stellar content. Lesson learned: the package in which the material is delivered is as important as the material itself.

SO…What in your business is in need of a face-lift? Some renergized effort? A creative overhaul? Better branding?

Is it your website, business card, brochure/literature, blog, logo, title, you? There are so many channels in which we communicate with each other, prospects and customers, ALL of which reflect the image of your brand. How are you capitalizing on these opportunities?

There are three key areas that will add to what you are doing now and make it better.

First, get branded! Decide on what your brand is going to be and put it on everything. Creating a brand and sticking with it is key to making your name known and recognized by the people you do business with and more importantly the people you WANT to do business with.

Two, get fresh! Whatever you put out in the marketplace make sure it is clean, crisp, sharp, fresh, modern. I did not say trendy. Don’t mistake what’s fresh and modern for something that is trendy. The internet and social media are not going anywhere, so don’t think these are trends. Incorporate them into your fresh look. Neon colors were a trend for nail polish last year. Alert: this is a trend. So it’s safe to say, I would not have created a whole business campaign with neon colors. When attempting to freshen up your look, stay with what’s tried and true, but make it your own.

Three, get creative! This is what most people will struggle with. “I’m not creative. I don’t think that way.” To that I respond: WHATEVER! If you aren’t creative, hire someone who is. Creativity is golden in a marketplace of boring, stagnant, complacent companies. Dare to be different, right? Putting a creative spin onto your communication is the easiest way to truly engage your audience.

Branded, Fresh, Creative, Got it? Now get going! Explore your world of communication channels and open your eyes to the possibilities of a face-lift. I promise, you’ll be glad you did.

I’m your Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. How may I help you, help yourself?