I am a Victoria's Secret Model

I am a Victoria’s Secret Model.

I am America’s Next Top Model.                                    

I am the next American Idol.

I am Top Chef.

I am the next best-selling author.

At least in my head I am.

I’m also a realist and I understand I’m a pear-shaped, shaky soprano, take-out queen.

But in my head I’m a lot of things. That’s where all of my dreams, aspirations, and confidence live, in the conscience of my being. What’s swimming in the depths of your core? What are you dreaming of achieving?

As I’ve aged I’ve realized a few things about dreams. They coincide greatly with your confidence. You are either your worst critic or your best cheerleader. All greatness comes from a core belief inside you, not from your mom, dad, brother, sister, dog, friend, boss, or spouse. It comes solely from you. Do tell me, who is lining your subconscious sideline, a critic or a cheerleader?

Growing up I was teased about my big nose (um, duh, I’m Italian). In high school, I didn’t go to prom. I wasn’t even asked. In college, I was self-conscience about my hips, thighs and butt. I felt bad about myself. And when the many would compliment me, contrary to what the few had critiqued me on, I would brush it off. Because it was easier to believe what the critics would say – because that is what I believed.

And then something happened. Little by little, I built upon the small and fleeting moments of self-love. I contribute a lot of this revelation to maturing and determining that I’m not going to live based on what others think of me. The other part came from the encouraging words of others, being successful in my work, and allowing the real Stephanie to stand up.

Here is how you can begin believing you are more than what you think you are:

1. Accept and believe the compliments you receive. When someone decides to say something of a complimentary nature, it is downright rude of you not to accept it. So be polite and say thank you. Most people are trained to challenge or argue compliments. Who taught you that? Didn’t your mother teach you better than that? Don’t discount their compliment because of your own self-doubt. Instead build upon it. When you start with a thank you and focus on what they have told you, you will begin to build up your own self-confidence.

2. Write down self-love affirmations. There are things that you love about yourself. Come on, you’re sexy and you know it! Your job is to capture these and write them down. Just like goals, it’s easier to believe something when it’s written down. You don’t have to share these with anyone, BUT you do need to share them with yourself. Capture the thoughts, dreams, and aspirations that are in the corners of your heart and head. The thoughts you believe others would find you insane, for these are the real gems.

3. Ignore the critics. It’s not easy, but it is necessary to build your self-confidence. It may sting at first, but the easiest response is to treat the critic just like the cheerleader and say “thank you.” However, instead of accepting it, dismiss it. Easier said than done, I know. But it’s necessary. You are not living your life for anyone other than you. Once you realize this truth, you will break free from the chains of criticism.

4. Encourage others. You will in turn encourage yourself. If you want to build up your own self-belief, self-confidence, and self-love, start by building someone else’s. The positive words you speak to others will start to creep into your own subconscious, challenging you to believe more in yourself. Try it out. The worst that can happen is you help someone. Would that be so terrible?

These days I see my nose as a symbol of my heritage. I’m embracing my pear assets. And I believe it when someone tells me I’m beautiful. I believe it, because I, internally with all of who I am, truly believe it. Now where’s the runway?

I’m your Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. How may I help you help yourself?

Stephanie Melish, one of the few, hand-selected, Gitomer-Certified Speakers is the ONLY Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista in the world! Stephanie trains, sells, and speaks to companies and associations all over the country. To book Stephanie for your next event, please visit www.GitomerCertified.com or contact the friendly folks at Buy Gitomer via email at hirestephanie@gitomer.com or by calling 704-333-1112.

Brand to Become

Brands are not for companies. Brands are for people. Brands are for you.

What's your brand?
What are you known for?
What are you known as?
What do you want to be known as?

I met a gentleman who is a fellow speaker and I asked him what he speaks on. He started to stammer and said, "I get that question a lot. Do you want to know what I do speak on or what I want to speak on?"

FAIL. Major fail.

How can you be a speaker and not be prepared to answer the most common question you most likely get asked? And how can you stammer when you are a professional speaker?

But his response got me thinking, at least talking to him was good for something (thanks for the article, buddy!).

How many people are doing something now but have something else they would rather be doing?
How many people are stuck with no hope to get out?
How many people think they can't change who they are?

"When I was young I didn't know what I wanted to be, but I always knew the kind of woman I wanted to become." Diane von Furstenburg said this in an interview. It's powerful and it's eye-opening. Who do you want to become?

You can be catapulted from who you are now to who you want to become through branding. So, I ask again, what's your brand?

Don't have one? Make one. Create one. Build one.

It's easy. You only need these four items:

1. Power Title. Or a logo, or a blog, or a motto, or anything different that represents who you are. Mine happens to be my title. My brand started through my title. When Gitomer hired me to work for him, I had free rein to create my title. I like to be creative and I thought long and hard before I struck a chord on the Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. This title has received more compliments and notoriety than any other title I could have come up with. It's created my brand and I've ran with it. I'm known as the Sales Barista. People know me. People who I don't know, know me. You know me. I have a brand. A coffee-centric, unique, creative, professional, and friendly brand. What's your brand?

2. Network. Beyond a great title, you have to have a great network. This network has to be full of successful people who are willing to help YOU become more successful (thank you Jeffrey!). Your network is essential to helping your brand become known. People learn about me through other people talking about me, sharing my blog and articles, and re-tweeting me. There are three types of networks: personal, professional, and social media. You must have people helping you on all three levels to truly excel. Who's in your network? Who's willing to help you become who you want to be?

3. Platform. Your platform and network work together. The network is the people who help you, the platform is the tools that you use. I'm a writer, so I use Sales Caffeine and my blog to get my words out in the world. And sometimes people like what I write, they like my philosophies, and so they share them. My platform is my blog, my social media channels (Facebook business page, Twitter, LinkedIn), Ace of Sales, and my job. All of these tools help build my brand and make me more known. What's your platform?

4. A bigger picture. Furstenburg's quote sums this up perfectly. The bigger picture is what you want to become. The bigger picture encapsulates three things: how do you want to be known, what and who do you want to influence, and what image do you want to portray? What's your bigger picture?

I'm a Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. That's my brand and it all started with a title, a conversation starting, brand making title. Thankfully I love the brand I stumbled upon. I never dreamed it would become as big of a brand as it has and I am drinking it up. Here's the good news, you are here from the beginning. You can say, "I knew her back when," when I've become who I want to become.

Your brand can become whatever you want it to be.

Start small. Create your creative power title, start using Ace of Sales to immediately brand yourself (get 45 days free by using my special promocode: barista45), create a social media presence, and use your network to spread your brand.

Start now.
Start being who you want to become.
Start the brand you want to be.

I'm your Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. How may I help you help yourself?

Stephanie Melish, one of the few, hand-selected, Gitomer-Certified Speakers is the ONLY Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista in the world! Stephanie trains, sells, and speaks to companies and associations all over the country. To book Stephanie for your next event, please visit www.GitomerCertified.com or contact the friendly folks at Buy Gitomer via email or by calling 704-333-1112.

Passion Cake

I love cake. Chocolate cake, marble cake, cheesecake, ice cream cake, pineapple upside down cake, wedding cake, cupcake, pretty much any way you want to bake it, I'll take a piece of cake. And, I love Buddy the Cake Boss.

Do you know Buddy? Owner of Carlo's Bakery in Hoboken, New Jersey, star of his own TLC show, Cake Boss, you know, BUDDY? Well, Buddy is my perfect slice of passion cake.

Never heard of passion cake? Well that's probably because I just made it up! But here's what I'm talking about.

Passion cake (noun), as defined by the Melish Dictionary of Made Up Words: is a person who lives, breathes, dies, emulates, and exudes passion throughout their career, making it appear as if it's a piece of cake to accomplish being the best.

Buddy is a piece of passion cake. He is arguably one of the best cake bakers and decorators of our generation. Don't believe me? Catch an episode. You won't just salivate over the delicious cakes he produces, you'll also be amazed at the passionate energy he displays as he works on some of the most impossible works of cake art. He's a cake genius who's made himself THE BEST and surrounds himself with THE BEST. His army of family and employees share his passion for cake. It's a little family business that's struck it rich, one cake at a time.

Ready to be a passion cake? Sure you are. Here are the first few steps you need to start baking.

1. Identify - First things first, you have to identify the main ingredient in your passion cake. What is your passion? What do you love more than anything else? What makes you smile? What makes you want to jump out of bed or stay up all night? What gets you excited? What's the passion that shines out of you for everyone to take notice? Not sure? Can't identify it? Spend some time writing down your favorite activities, past times, or memories and see if there is a common denominator.

2. Evaluate - After you identify your main ingredient, you have to evaluate what you're currently baking. Are you in a position that uses that passion? And uses it to it's fullest? No? It's time to evaluate if you're ready, willing, and able to make a change so you can do what you love. Life's too short to be a piece of passionless cake.

3. Implement - Start baking! Get a plan together. Write down what you need to do to start putting your passion in action. You can start slow (think cupcake) and work your way up to it, or jump all in (think fully decorated wedding cake). You be the judge on that. Whatever you do, don't make excuses. The time is NOW!

4. Surround - Pick out your other ingredients. Surround yourself with a support system. People, who share your passion, vision, dream, or just want to see you happy. These people will help keep you accountable and be your biggest co-bakers.

It's never too late to start baking your own piece of heavenly passion cake. The moment you say the time has passed you by is the moment you've allowed your cake to burn.

By the way, did I mention I love cake?

I'm your Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. How may I help you help yourself?

Stephanie Melish, one of the few, hand-selected, Gitomer-Certified Speakers is the ONLY Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista in the world! Stephanie trains, sells, and speaks to companies and associations all over the country. To book Stephanie for your next event, visit www.GitomerCertified.com or contact the friendly folks at Buy Gitomer via email or by calling 704-333-1112.

It’s My sTORI and I’m Sticking to It!

Love her or hate her, Tori Spelling is capitalizing on a little something I call namesake branding. Recently launching an extension of her vast brand, Tori hit another branding home run by naming her new LA clothing store InvenTORI. Brilliant? No question.

After decades of only being known as the daughter of the late Aaron Spelling, and being ridiculed for her non-existing acting skills as virgin Donna while on Beverly Hills 90210 (although as a child of the Saved By the Bell years, I LOVED the dorky Violet Anne Bickerstaff), Tori has launched a mega-empire built on one thing, her name.

So NoTORIous (TV show), Tori & Dean: Inn Love (TV show), sTORI Telling (book), Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood (TV show), The Tori Spelling Collection (jewelry), uncharted terriTori (book), InvenTori (clothing store), Tori & Dean: sTORIbook Weddings (TV show).

Tori after Tori, she’s made an impressive namesake brand. Not a Tori Spelling fan? Think this is irrelevant because she’s my shining example? A few other great namesakes:

Gitomer, DUH! A branding king, each of his books and two of his companies are titled “Jeffrey Gitomer’s…” and his other company is BuyGitomer. Creative, smart, call to action. BUY – Gitomer!

Oprah, the queen of America, uses namesake branding too. The Oprah Winfrey Show, Harpo Studios (Oprah backwards), Harpo Productions, Harpo Films, OWN (Oprah Winfrey Network), O Magazine, O at Home, Oprah and Friends.

Got it?

But Tori isn’t stopping, her next book, celebraTORI releases this coming October. You may not think she is a great actress but she is a smart businesswoman. As a hands-on business owner of several companies, an author of three best-selling books, and appearing on reality TV, she has launched herself into a sTORIland all her own.

You may think there is not much to it. WRONG! Namesake branding is a moneymaking – image creating – story land.

What about your story? Your brand? Your image? Your creative spin? Your smart marketing appeal?

Think about all of the names connected to you. First name, last name, maiden name, middle name, nickname, company name, etc. How creatively congruent have you made your company? Or better yet, why should you take the time to namesake your branding? I’m so happy you asked!

1. It’s personable. Creating a brand around your name means you're creating a brand around YOU! And what’s more personable than a person? Doing business with someone who has poured out his or her heart, soul, and passion into their work is a must! And if they use their name it’s a no-brainer. I want to do business with someone who is committed to their work, their business, their industry, and their success. What bigger commitment can you make than putting your name on it? (Putting a ring on it – but that is usually followed by some kind of name change!)

2. It’s recognizable. The easiest way to get lost in the big business shuffle is to not be recognizable to your customers. Each of your products, services, and marketing efforts must have a consistent thread woven through their name. It all starts there. If you can be creative and consistent with the name, your customers will have immediate recognition of your personal brand.

3. It’s achievable. Capitalizing on your name is the easiest thing you can do. Thanks to your parents, they gave you one; all you have to do is start using it! Be creative, be wild, be out of the box, be different, BUT be uniform. I may work for a company that is not my own – but that didn’t stop me from creating my own brand – Stephanie Melish, the Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista, and it’s worked! If I can make it happen, so can you.

That’s my sTORI and I’m sticking to it!

I’m Stephanie Melish, your Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista. How may I help you help yourself?

Stephanie Melish, one of the few, hand-selected, Gitomer-Certified Speakers is the ONLY Double-Tall, Non-Fat, No-Whip Sales Barista in the world! Stephanie trains, sells, and speaks to companies and associations all over the country. To book Stephanie for your next event, visit www.GitomerCertified.com or contact the friendly folks at Buy Gitomer via email or by calling 704-333-1112.